Announcing the first Skill Up Skillet poll! What will September’s Featured post be?

Partially inspired from the recent Blogging 201 course, Skill Up Skillet is launching its first poll! That’s right, each month I’ll be asking you, Dedicated Reader, which recipe you want to see featured next month. September will feature a famous (or infamous, depending…) recipe from the cartoon South Park. Don’t like the topic? Say it to my face! Contact me through the About page, pronto. Your idea may be considered for a future poll. Damn right I’m serious.

Spoiler: Feedback is set to immediate. Don’t like the dish that’s in the lead? Do something about it! Share this post with your friends, family, coworkers, enemies, imaginary friends, split personalities, and/or pets.

Voting will be held throughout the month of August. Go forth, spread the word! (At least I’m not making you choose between a Giant Douche and a Turd Sandwich.)

Remember, cooking IRL doesn’t have to be a Feat of Strength!

Materia Candy Buttons: Final Fantasy Comes To Life!

Difficulty2Did you know there are virtually no candies out in the world commemorating materia from Final Fantasy VII? Seriously. Look it up: “materia candy”. You will find some really sexy looking marbled chocolates retailing for ~$30 USD. That’s it. And while they look amazing, I’m looking for something a little more… affordable. And while we’re revisiting one of the most beloved RPG’s ever, why not do it with an additional blast from the past: button candy! The little sugary hard candy drops that always stuck to the damn paper, remember? Well. Guess what? These homemade candy buttons don’t stick to the damn paper. For the most part. Like maybe 1 in 100 will stick a bit. That’s it. And that’s worth it. I went with three colors of materia (Red/Summoning, Yellow/Support, Green/Magic), but you can get as complex with this as you’d like (blue would look amazing). I’ll also be uploading my candy button template later on today. Just save and print! Ready? Let’s go. Continue reading Materia Candy Buttons: Final Fantasy Comes To Life!

So Bloglovin’ is a thing…

And you will get your damn widget in due time, preferably when WordPress is supported and I don’t have to make my own stuff because it’s too early to think.

Also, it seems strange to type up a post for a simple link to ‘claim my blog’ so let’s do the talking thing, yeah? I don’t suppose I’ve actually made an announcement regarding a recent site update so let’s talk about that.


Hear ye, hear ye!

The Tag Cloud of Murkiness has dissipated!

I say, the tag cloud has fled into the countryside!

In its stead, we now give rise

to a swanky new site feature:

Feed Your Fandom.

No longer will you be left

in a Land of Confusion,

burdened by an ever-growing list of obscure ingredients and references.

Sing now your praises!

Your never-ending quest for The Doctor,

for the Ring, your diamonds and Dragon Shouts,

I tell you my friend:

Your quest has reached its epic conclusion!

Yay,your princess is in this castle!

‘Tis cause for celebration!

Squire, fetch the ale;

Fool, the band and maidens fair

for you can now gaze upon this menu

and select your feast of fancy,

your bountiful banquet.


Right – it’s 7am on a Monday, I’ve had one cup of coffee, and I can’t do this anymore. You can now search for recipes by clicking on your favorite fandom. Legend of Zelda? Sonic the Hedgehog? Super Mario? We’ve got that. Check out the new Feed Your Fandom menu on the left when you have a chance. It’s pretty sweet. You can actually find cool stuff you want now.

Stay tuned for FFVII on Thursday.



Remember, cooking IRL doesn’t have to be a Feat of Strength!

Portal Slushies

Difficulty1Is the cake a lie or not? Today it is, but these slushies will get you one week closer to the fabled cake. (Well of course it’s going to be my birthday cake, what did you think?) Portal and Portal 2 are a couple of my favorites, just don’t ask me to play them. For some reason my brain just will not process many of the puzzles presented in the games. I don’t know why, I just can’t. It’s fun to watch others play though. But you know what I can wrap my head around? These slushies! So easy to make, and only two ingredients:

1. Liquid (if liquid = Sprite)


2. Crack (if crack = Skittles)

These slushies are bright and fruity with just a tingle of carbonation on the tongue. The best part? You only need your refrigerator. That’s right; no processing, no blending, no crushing, nothing. Plus, with summer heating up these are the perfect thing. Ready? Let’s go.

Continue reading Portal Slushies

“I’d like to thank the Fandoms…” – I’ve won an award!

Big thanks to Effervescent Hedgepig for nominating me for the Liebster Award! If you have any interest in jewelry whatsoever, why not hop on over and see what she has going on? She even sells her pieces on Etsy, which is pretty rad. Eventually I’d like to market my blog as well, in the form of the most geeky and sarcastic not-a-cookbook cookbook you’ll ever read. Some day!  I suck at talking about myself so it took me forever to get around to doing this; hope you enjoy.

The Liebster Award is an award for small or new blogs that deserve a chance in the spotlight.  Once received, it’s passed on (as a chain letter might be) to other blogs that the recipient thinks are worthy of attention, and so forth.  By asking each nominee to answer a set of questions, the award allows new bloggers to tell their audience something about themselves. Ready? Let’s go.

liebster Continue reading “I’d like to thank the Fandoms…” – I’ve won an award!

Omelette du Fromage- A Dexter’s Laboratory Recipe

Difficulty2It’s time to break out your Inner 90’s Kid with this one. Let’s go back to a simpler time: a time when Saturday morning cartoons was your first true religion. For a lot of us, Dexter’s Laboratory  easily made the Top 10 Best Cartoons. If you disagree, you’re lying. But what is ‘Omelette du Fromage’ actually about? One episode, Dexter decided to learn French by playing a language tape as he slept. One problem: The tape got stuck on repeat! Poor guy, the only thing he heard that night was ‘Omelette du Fromage’. Thus one of your favorite childhood memes began:

The only sort-of-French you ever learned as a kid.
The only sort-of-French you ever learned as a kid.

Incidentally, ‘Omelette du Fromage’ isn’t actually a thing. The correct saying is actually ‘Omelette AU Fromage’. In any case, with all this talk of breakfast floating about, who wants a strange French cheese omelette? That’s what I thought. Let’s go.

Continue reading Omelette du Fromage- A Dexter’s Laboratory Recipe

Shokugeki no Soma – My (Bastardized yet Addictive Version of) Chaliapin Steak

Note: Neo thought it should be 3 Skillets because of the alcohol. Take that however you will.
Note: Neo thought it should be 3 Skillets because of the alcohol. Take that however you will.

What do you do when you see an anime dish you’re dying to replicate but don’t have all the ingredients on hand? Two options come to mind: Either you pop down to the nearest supermarket or you improvise. Some seriously great cooking can be directly attributed to improvisation so why not, right?

So there’s this new anime we discovered about two weeks ago called Shokugeki no Soma (Food Wars!) In a nutshell, it’s about the adventures of a skilled teenage chef sent off to an illustrious cooking academy. Cue intense cooking showdowns, hilarity, and all manner of ridiculousness. Also they liken good cooking to sex. Who can’t get behind that?! Plus, this is an anime that knows its stuff. The characters really get into the science of how and why a dish works. Need more convincing? Well, if you say so…

When the main character created this dish to compete against A5 grade Wagyu beef I knew I had to recreate it. And despite the fact that I am now out of steak I’ve been making this sauce to complement several meals since. It. Is. That. Good. This is my personal adaptation. Ready? Let’s go!

Continue reading Shokugeki no Soma – My (Bastardized yet Addictive Version of) Chaliapin Steak

Minecraft TNT Cake pt. 2



At long last (and after 15 hours of decorating) I give you the mother of all cakes: the Minecraft TNT Block Cake. All will bask in its splendor. (I have had two hours of sleep and I want to die a little.) As always, I will be the first to admit to you that I fucked up. Several times, in fact. However, the end result is nothing short of spectacular. Worth repeating? Sure, but not any time soon. I should have known when the craft and grocery store cashiers gave me a spirited pep talk that I was in for it. Do I ever learn?

What makes this cake so challenging, you ask?

  1. The scale. This. Cake. Is. Massive.
  2. Decoration, decoration, decoration.The fondant work is nothing short of intense.

The recipe used for this cake is a red velvet cake recipe with cream cheese frosting. Unfortunately, I’m an idiot and replaced liquid food coloring with gel food coloring because I listened to other people instead of following my instincts. That… is the only significant fuck-up you’ll notice. However, I did end up with a rather lovely, light and fluffy cake so I can’t even be mad. It’s just… not red. Oh bloody well. The flavor is outstanding and the frosting is perfectly creamy, spreadable, and delicious. Even the store-bought fondant (which I’ve never used before in my life) was relatively easy to work with. Even after all the math.

Yes, you read correctly: this cake requires math. It’s not particularly challenging math but it is annoying and repetitive. But hey, if I can do it, absolutely you can do it too.

Unfortunately a little late this week. Looking for more 4th of July appropriate recipes? I think Captain America Fruit Pizza would be right up your alley.

Ready? Let’s go.

Continue reading Minecraft TNT Cake pt. 2

Minecraft TNT Cake, pt. 1

I am working on it I swear. Do you see this nonsense? This is a four layer, 9″ square homemade Cake of Doom, with extra special homemade Cream Doom Frosting. This is seriously a behemoth of a cake. Cake-fucking-zilla, if you will. What do you even do with this much cake? Why did I make this much cake? Was I on drugs? Seriously, though, this is a big ass cake. The fondant bit is going to take me a minute. You are going to have to deal with that. I do intend to finish this today. And there will be pyrotechnics.

Okay, seriously though: What do you do with this much cake?